Archive for Comedy

A Message To Immigrants

Posted in America, Australia, Britain, Canada, England, European Union, Germany, Immigrants, News, UK with tags , , , on 06/09/2016 by floroy1942

Trust the Aussies to say how it really is. Worth watching, and a pointer to many European countries …… and America!

 

Roy.

A VERY Funny Joke About Brexit!

Posted in America, Australia, Britain, British Humour, Canada, David Cameron, Elections, European Union, News, Politics with tags , , , , on 02/07/2016 by floroy1942

This was sent to me by a friend, and believe me, it is so funny you won’t want to miss it. By the way, the sub-titles are not accurate if you speak Spanish.

I bet you couldn’t stop laughing could you! I know I couldn’t!

Roy.

The Alternative ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Posted in America, Britain, England, Europe, European Union, News, Old Age Pensioner, Senior Citizen, UK, USA with tags , , , , on 03/08/2014 by floroy1942

This book, now famous, has been read by millions of people but I nearly hurt myself laughing at this alternative version. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Fifty Shades of Grey
 by Pam Ayres

 


The missus bought a paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;
T’was “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

 

Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread…

In her left she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.

 

 Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Ethel hasn’t weathered well;
She’s eighty four next week!!

 

Watching Ethel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

 

She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
I am a dominator !!

 

Now if you knew our Ethel,
You’d see just why I spluttered,
I’d spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I’d uttered.

 

She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!

 

Ethel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
“Step on the other one!!

 

Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey.

 

First of all let me apologise to Pam Aryes for any slight she may feel has been committed here, and secondly my thanks to a friend who sent me this. Third, my thanks and appreciation to the unknown writer of this masterpiece of satire.

Roy.

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